Dear John, The love that I have in past expressed for you was completely imagined. I find that my disgust for you increases daily. The more I hear from you, the more you appear in my eyes an object of contempt and ridicule. I feel in every way completely disposed and determined to despise you. Believe me, I have never had any intention to marry you and love you always. Your last letter has left a sorry impression, which has by no means given me the most exalted opinion of your character. Your nagging, foul temper would drive me to an early grave. If we were married I would experience nothing but the ridicule and derision of friends and the everlasting dis- pleasure of supporting and caring for my spouse and family. Furthermore, I know that your life will be a complete failure. I speak sincerely, and I hope that you will do me the favor of staying out of my life. Don't bother with the trouble of replying to this, since your letters are always full of meaningless, boring drivel and haven't the slightest bit of humor and deep meaning. Believe me when I say I am so repulsed by you that it is impossible for me ever to be yours. Sincerely, Jane P.S. I have changed my mind so start over and read every other line. Back to Gallery of Funny Stories | Back to Gallery of Funny Stuff |
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